The eye of Sarumayonnaise is upon you


Of all the horrifying elements included in this culinary abortion the worst has got to be the red “frosting” ribbon circumventing the top. Look at the ingredients. What the fuck is the red shit? Is…is it ketchup? Did they actually make a mayonnaise/Jell-o/tuna casserole worse by decorating that wobbly dinner joke with ketchup? Or is this just demonstrative of the wasted hours spent artfully jamming pimentos onto an inedible dish that will make your husband and children dissolve into uncontrollable weeping from which there is no reprieve save for the sporadic bouts of volcanic vomiting? If you fix your family an inedible meal where your refrigerator does most of the work but spend hours decorating the balls out of this jizzerole that you’re trying to pass off as food, see a shrink immediately. Your passive aggression is out of hand. This jellied disaster looks even more rank than that custardy mess pictured below and if I had a gun to my head I couldn’t decide which I’d rather eat…


Yes this is a cookbook filled with semen recipes and no I’m not making this shit up.

It’s like playing Who’d Ya Rather? with your options being Jim Bob Duggar and Rush Limbaugh.


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