What is this, “Heathers?”


“Welcome home, son! Would you like a nice hot cup of cocoa?”

“Yeah, dad!”

“Well tough shit, because your drunken slore of a mother forgot to go shopping again and she drank the last of the vodka. Have one of my Butter Marys. You have to put it in the microwave every two minutes otherwise it solidifies. I’m going to Betty’s. If your mother regains consciousness tell her I want jellied mashed potatoes, Spamberry sauce, and tomato Jell-o with some kind of crap jammed in there for dinner tomorrow.”


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